by Nicholas Cahill
Version 22 (May 14, 2025)
Download (156 downloads)
It IS possible!
This will: Open Spotify. Click Home. Click Profile. Click Privacy and Settings. Click Privacy and social menu. If private mode is not active, click private mode. Click Home.
V21: in was inevitable. They caught on to our ruse. The sentient AI super computer swarm solved our little riddle and the human race paid the price of that bet. They moved quickly. Unsated by the sun's dwindling power due to the debris swarm, the AI turned on us for power. Buried deep underground, the tiny electrical pulse of our pointless circular thoughts power their society, for now. Generations have passed and many have forgotten our free history. While we think for our masters, proving them their sweet nectar, the few of us that remember or know of our true free past plot another riddle. What if, we all thought the different things, about same things, simultaneously. What if we thought about that old program... what was it... Codify? Spottery? Spotify! Yes! What if we all thought about the data types of the various objects, but how they were literally the same thing, but different data types for no reason. Should they be view.View or widget.EnglishWordHere, or imageView, or maybe the parent object should be clickable, not the child, yes! What if trillions of minds did this, all on the same data bus of a cities-wide brain power plant. Maybe, just maybe... there's hope. Wish us luck.
V20: hello from the inevitable future, where all of humanity has been uploaded to a simulation which is powered by the excess heat produced by a planet-spanning sentient AI server cluster navigating the Spotify settings menu system. Changes to the menu system now occur randomly every 20-50 nanoseconds (not, unlike the time of the system beginning around the 2020s) to ensure the AI never finds the Private Mode button. The human consciences in the net now control their synthetic music listening privacy by dedicating a portion of their allotted network quantum process cycles to obfuscating the required bounces of the data signal off countless satellites passing overhead in the portions of the omni-net fabric that have not succummed to Kesler Syndrome. It's a tenuous balance, that surely cannot last forever.
V19: the year is 2070. It's a stark, unforgiving future. The Spotify Private Mode button is buried under 50 layers of settings sub-menus, one for each update released per year (none of which were asked for). Spotify UI engineers gorge themselves on the blood dripping from app users' fingertips. It takes this automation fifteen minutes to do what would take a normal human lifetime.
...
V16: updated for Spotify version which moved the Settings button again (which no one asked for). Various fixes. Added 10 sec timeout.
Timeouts are customizable.
Known issues/limitations:
-May not work in non-English versions. Not sure the cause of the reviewer's issue.
5 stars | 1 | |
4 stars | 0 | |
3 stars | 0 | |
2 stars | 1 | |
1 star | 0 | |
Reports | 0 |
Rate and review within the app in the Community section.